The concept in general is that people express love to others in the way they would want it, not in the way the other person would want it I don't think I agree with the first part of that sentence. I tend to believe that people express love to others in the way they are best able to do it and according to what they believe the other person wants. Obviously, their perception of what other people want is coloured by their own preferences, but I know people who cook for other people because they cook well and know that others enjoy their cooking. They assume that others will interpret cooking as an act of love, but they don't expect the objects of their affection to cook for them or even do acts of service for them. (Parent-child relationships tend to work that way. Needless to say, children don't see cooking as an expression of love, but as a parental duty ...) And if fan fiction is to be trusted, then many women expect gifts as an expression of love, but wouldn't really think of expressing their own love through gifts. Touch may be the exception in that people who don't want to be touched are unlikely to express affection through hugs, but that may be because it's impossible to touch someone without being touched yourself.
So, while House definitely wants Wilson to spend time with him, does House wants acts of services directed towards him? I think that House is perceptive enough not to expect things others can't give and selfish enough to take everything he can get. I think he wants quality time from Wilson while he could do very well without the accompanying words, but he's aware that Wilson's words express his love, so he puts up with it. I think he'd rather have acts of service -- he's quick to eat everything that Wilson is so foolish as to leave within his radius of destruction -- but if Wilson were to give gifts, he'd adapt to that too.
What led me to think Wilson is words is because he wanted House to tell him he loves him. My problem with that is that their relationship functioned just fine without verbal protestations for, what, twenty years? before Wilson suddenly needed words. The previous times their relationship was seriously stressed (Tritter, Amber's death, S7 finale) it wasn't because of anything House didn't say, it was because of something House did or was perceived to have done. In all three cases I don't think there's anything House could have said that would have made things better for Wilson. In the Vogler arc, both are convinced that no matter what House says, he'll always act the same way, so his words are of no significance for their relationship. For me, Wilson's desire for verbal protestations came out of the blue. It wasn't something I expected given what I'd seen of him so far. As such, I consider it an anomaly, not his normal mode.
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Date: 2014-06-09 09:21 pm (UTC)I don't think I agree with the first part of that sentence. I tend to believe that people express love to others in the way they are best able to do it and according to what they believe the other person wants. Obviously, their perception of what other people want is coloured by their own preferences, but I know people who cook for other people because they cook well and know that others enjoy their cooking. They assume that others will interpret cooking as an act of love, but they don't expect the objects of their affection to cook for them or even do acts of service for them. (Parent-child relationships tend to work that way. Needless to say, children don't see cooking as an expression of love, but as a parental duty ...) And if fan fiction is to be trusted, then many women expect gifts as an expression of love, but wouldn't really think of expressing their own love through gifts. Touch may be the exception in that people who don't want to be touched are unlikely to express affection through hugs, but that may be because it's impossible to touch someone without being touched yourself.
So, while House definitely wants Wilson to spend time with him, does House wants acts of services directed towards him?
I think that House is perceptive enough not to expect things others can't give and selfish enough to take everything he can get. I think he wants quality time from Wilson while he could do very well without the accompanying words, but he's aware that Wilson's words express his love, so he puts up with it. I think he'd rather have acts of service -- he's quick to eat everything that Wilson is so foolish as to leave within his radius of destruction -- but if Wilson were to give gifts, he'd adapt to that too.
What led me to think Wilson is words is because he wanted House to tell him he loves him.
My problem with that is that their relationship functioned just fine without verbal protestations for, what, twenty years? before Wilson suddenly needed words. The previous times their relationship was seriously stressed (Tritter, Amber's death, S7 finale) it wasn't because of anything House didn't say, it was because of something House did or was perceived to have done. In all three cases I don't think there's anything House could have said that would have made things better for Wilson. In the Vogler arc, both are convinced that no matter what House says, he'll always act the same way, so his words are of no significance for their relationship. For me, Wilson's desire for verbal protestations came out of the blue. It wasn't something I expected given what I'd seen of him so far. As such, I consider it an anomaly, not his normal mode.